Powerless

I am the clay and You are the potter. I want You to mold me, to conform to Your hand and yet I continue to stiffen, struggling to maintain shape. It is hard, too hard to keep it all together....I am pushed and pulled in many directions. My desires, thoughts, and fears overtake and manipulate me. I get scared; If I give myself completely over, what will you make of me Lord? Trust does not come easily to me. I believe that You are good and want good things for me...so why Lord, why do I struggle with trusting You? I have no real power...not even to control my own thoughts and actions, yet I continue to pursue You in my own strength - “If I get this right...If I dot all my i's and cross all my t's, I can be close to You.” I continue to believe that my actions have power. Sin separates us...this is true, but in my own strength I do not even have the ability to accomplish my own will much less Yours. I cannot save myself from sin or death. You alone are my Savior! Salvation is your gift to me. Please Father help me to trust. Help me to give my life to You....as You gave Your life for me.

Psalm 40:11-12 (VOICE)

Please, Eternal One, don’t hold back
Your kind ways from me.
I need Your strong love and truth
to stand watch over me and keep me from harm.
Right now I can’t see because I am surrounded by troubles;
my sins and shortcomings have caught up to me,
so I am swimming in darkness.
Like the hairs on my head, there are too many to count,
so my heart deserts me.